Alien

Last week I was away at a business trip. The meeting took place in the home of the presenter, specifically, in her living room. She has very high ceilings making for a little reverb. There was myself and four other co-workers present at the meeting. On the very first day, breakfast and lunch were catered. Breakfast was an egg taco, fruit, and yogurt. I took a little of everything, keeping in mind my quest to lose the eight L.B.’s I gained in the past two months.

Breakfast is done and we are listening to the speaker. It’s quiet, other than the sound of her voice.

My stomach grumbled a bit. I paid no mind.

Then,

GROWL!

‘Huh?’ I thought. ‘Was that me?’

‘I think it was, but, whatever.’

Then my tummy moved a little bit.

Hmm?

Then, a louder,

GROWL!

I turned to the woman next to me, “I’m sorry,” I said.

I hoped that that was the end of it. We would just move on. Until >>>

GROWL!

Oh no! Not again!!

Someone on the other side of the room yelled out, “I heard that!” Then everyone started laughing.

‘Shit! What the heck is going on?’

I felt like the Alien was inside of me, trying to get out. Well, I just wish it would come out already and stop this!

I stepped out to the washroom, hoping that something in there would stop the noises. I got back to my chair. Sat down.

‘Ok,’ I thought. ‘I’m fine now. It’s not gonna happen again.’

A few minutes later.

Yup.

Oy.

I mean, this went on all day!

I thought I’d eat light at lunchtime. It didn’t help. The alien in my stomach could not get free.

It growled so much, that the rest just stopped commenting on it. But I was still squirming in my chair every time it happened.

Finally it was dinnertime, and we were off to a restaurant. Thank goodness it was a noisy restaurant, so that my unborn child could make all the noise it wanted.

And it did.

That night, in my hotel room, I took a Tums, went to bed, with hopes that this alien nightmare would be all over by morning.