I Have Good Socks in the City

Since I broke up with my job, I’ve been staying at Mom’s in Long Island. I have a whole wardrobe there…here, so it’s comfortable. But my good clothes are in Manhattan.

I’ve noticed, though, since I’ve been here (in LI) that my clothes here are really a lot worse than I originally thought. My LI closets are usually where I bring my city stuff to die. If I’m not wearing the clothes in the city, I take it to LI. Then I think about it for a couple of years, until I donate them.

Problem is, I look like crap when I’m staying in LI.

Everything I’ve worn in the past two weeks is either too short, too tight, or too holy. And I don’t mean the religious kind.

I put on a T-shirt. It’s a belly shirt.

I put on a pair of jeans. They’re mom jeans.

I put on a robe. There’s a huge hole in the but.

I go to put on some socks. My big toe pops out. Or I wear them and they end up off my foot in my shoes after I walk a couple of steps. Ugh! They’re too loose, too tight, too polyester and make my feet freeze.

I have good socks in the city!